Summer must really be here. Tim said it was too hot to ride today. Oh you want to know what happened at the hospital?

Ok well it’s a long boring story and I don’t want to tell everyone bits of it lots of times so I’ll write it here once and then anyone who is interested can read it here. If you have any questions put them as comments and then I can answer them for everyone to see.

Let’s start at the beginning. I was on the way home from work on Monday 9th May, and I pulled out from behind a parked car without looking and was hit by and oncoming car at about 25 miles per hour. The car took my legs out and my shoulder hit the windscreen smashing it. I flipped over in the air and skidded across the floor. The bike was fine. Then I got up and a lady with no shoes on made me go into her house and offered me tea and fags. I declined. They rang the police and got an incident number but they didn’t attend the scene because no one was hurt. I then walked back to my bike, rode bac kto my car and drove home. I was in some pain but not that bad.

The next day it was go to work or go to hospital, so I chose the later. In A&E they told me I had fractured the top of my tibia – the tibia spine, so they put me in plaster and sent me away with crutches for 2 weeks.

I went back on Tuesday this week, they took the cast off and poked me around a bit. They weren’t sure what was up with my knee and wanted to do an MRI scan, but there was a long waiting list so they decided that the best way to get me a scan would be to admitt me to the hospital.

They wanted to get me a bad that day, so I hung around for 4 hours waiting for one, and sent my mum, who had given me a lift, home. Then they decided to send me home and told me to ring in for my bed the next day, so Tim came to get me. The plan was to get me a bed the next day, give me a scan, and an operation if I need it.

The next day Becky gave me a lift to the hopsital on her way to work. I got there at 8 and went to see the admissions department. They said they were trying to get me a bed, and told me to go and wait in the waiting room and they’d come and get me. 2 hours later I was getting bored so I went to see if they had a bed. They didn’t have any news and told me to keep waiting. I hadn’t eaten since breakfast becasue I had been told to starve myself in case I was having an operation that day. That means no food or drink at all. About 2 hours after that they came and told me they had a bed but I had to wait for the patient to vacate it. I continued to wait and starve myself for a few more hours.

At 4 o’clock, 8 hours since I got to the hospital and 9 hours since breakfast, I was sent to my bed. A little while later the doctors came. They couldn’t believe that I had been left waiting for so long. They said it was too late to have a scan or an operation that day, so I could eat and drink again and I had to stay over night so I could have my scan and operation the next day.

The next day I had a hospital breakfast but then I had to starve myself of food and drink again becasue I might be having an operation later. I was told to put a gown on ready for my scan, which was due at half eleven. At 12 I was taken down to the MRI room to have my scan. There was a prisoner down there too. I had to lay there totally still, and not move my knee at all while they scanned it for 20 minutes. This is harder than it sounds. It feels like it twitches all by itself. Anyway 20 minutes feels longer like that.

After the scan was done I went back to the ward, still starving myself. I was on the look out for doctors to find out what they wanted to do, if I needed an operation or anything. I eventually found them at about 4. That’s right I found them, they didn’t come to me. They asked if I’d had the scan – they didn’t know – and told me to eat becasue surgery had finished for the day. So that’s another 8 hours starving myself.

The next day (today) I wasn’t allowed breakfast becasue of my surgery – I didn’t know if I needed it and neither did the nurses. Then the nurses told me to put a gown on for my surgery, and the anesthetist came to see for about my surgery. I still didn’t know if I needed surgery.

At about 10 the doctors came to see me. They had looked at the MRI scan, and were holding it in an envelope, but wouldn’t let me look at it for some reason. They said that they wanted to put me to sleep so they could me the leg into a good postion and put a cast on. If they couldn’t get a good position then they would have to put a screw in the knee. I asked if they needed to put me to sleep and they said that it would be painful. I told them that my leg didn’t hurt to move it, and let them try in the ward. They said they would try and do it without anasthetic. I asked when the surgery would be and they said 11.30 at the latest.

At 1.30 I was picked up and taken to theatre. They took me in there. bent my leg and moved it around while they took some x-rays. Then they put a cast on and did some more x-rays and I was out of there. Going back in four weeks apparently. The doctor said my ligaments were very loose, but the bit of bone which was fractured was still attached and was in place. I can put weight on it and I have to excersise it as best as I can. Then I had lunch.

I don’t want to pass too much judgement on the hospital – you can make your own mind up, but it’s clear that there are major problems with communication and efficiency. Why was I in a bed? I didn’t need to be. Why couldn’t I look at the MRI scan? Why was I starved for 3 days? Why did they want to give me an anasthetic when it was completely unnecessary?

Hmm, bored now. Maybe more to come…


I now offically dislike Bono. Oh yeh, Radiohead don’t make cheesy pop records like vertigo because “they don’t have the energy”. what a load of crap. After the success of OK Computer Radiohead were faced with an impossible decision. Do they make another album like that, have huge success and sell out, or do they make a good record. They chose to make one of the best records ever, and then Bono come along and says they couldn’t face being a pop success. What an idiot. I guess he is just feeling guilty that U2 sold out big time with their last record. “yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh.”


News: Derelict BMX is officially the best website of all time. There have been about 3 updates a day now for a long time and they are all top quality updates with movies, riding and everything. Absolutley amazing.

Some other good website for you to look at:
Pretty Shady: Wait a few more weeks and then Joe’s exams will be done. Then there will be lots of updates again.
BMX Fraternity: I have only just found this site recently. Lots of updates and quality design.
Trendwhore BMX: A newish site. They’re trails look good, I want to see pictures of someone riding them.
Dig and Ride: Lots of good media in there.
Noid Clothing: Local Tenterden scene. Nigel has started updating it now so hopefully things will keep being added. Tom has a digi cam too so that will mean more media.
Small Wheels Big Thrills: Chris updated two days in a row the other day. Amazing
Wikstidian: Mark from Paddock wood. Why is it called that? This gets updated a lot at the moment


B00004L8JJ.03._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpgThis film stars Steve Martin and was made in 1987. It is about a man who has a very big nose. We are talking huge. It is a terrible, terrible film.

The star of the film is this firefighter who has an incredibly big nose. He also doesn’t take and nonsence from people who are rude about his nose. This is the only good thing about the film. Anyone who is rude about his nose gets pretty badly beaten up. This would be a good redeeming feature of the film if the action wasn’t so cheesy and terrible.

The rest of the film is a terrible love story, you can imagine what it’s like. The woman doesn’t like him becasue of his nose blah blah blah. This is interspersed with the slapstick comedy of the firemen being useless, which is about as funny as having you ear cut off.

I think it must be based on the french play “Cyrano de Bergerac” which is essentially about the same thing. To be honest this film was so terrible I am not going to waste any more of my timne writing about it or any of your time reading about it. Avoid like anthrax.

There is one part of the film that is quite good. This guy shouts “big nose” at our hero, and he turns around and says “is that the best you coukd come up with?” He then lists 20 funnier insults for people with big noses. Some of them are quite funny, but not worth watching the film for. Anyway, here are the “20 something betters”. There are actually 25:

1. Obvious: Excuse me. Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face.
2. Meteorological: Everybody take cover. She’s going to blow.
3. Fashionable: You know, you could de-emphasize your nose if you wore something larger. Like … Wyoming.
4. Personal: Well, here we are. Just the three of us.
5. Punctual: Alright gentlemen. Your nose was on time but you were fifteen minutes late.
6. Envious: Oooo, I wish I were you. Gosh. To be able to smell your own ear.
7. Naughty: Pardon me, Sir. Some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn’t mind putting that thing away.
8. Philosophical: You know. It’s not the size of a nose that’s important. It’s what’s in it that matters.
9. Humorous: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Sneeze and it’s goodbye Seattle.
10. Commercial: Hi, I’m Earl Schibe and I can paint that nose for $39.95.
11. Polite: Ah. Would you mind not bobbing your head. The orchestra keeps changing tempo.
12. Melodic: Everybody! “He’s got the whole world in his nose.”
13. Sympathetic: Oh, What happened? Did your parents lose a bet with God?
14. Complimentary: You must love the little birdies to give them this to perch on.
15. Scientific: Say, does that thing there influence the tides.
16. Obscure: Oh, I’d hate to see the grindstone.
17. Inquiry: When you stop to smell the flowers, are they afraid?
18. French: Say, the pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you leave.
19. Pornographic: Finally, a man who can satisfy two women at once.
20. Religious: The Lord giveth and He just kept on giving, didn’t He.
21. Disgusting: Say, who mows your nose hair.
22. Paranoid: Keep that guy away from my cocaine!
23. Aromatic: It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee … in Brazil.
24. Appreciative: Oooo, how original. Most people just have their teeth capped.
25. Dirty: Your name wouldn’t be Dick, would it?


Here are my statistics from this month 164 164 111 111 97 97 67 67 60 60 46 46 30 30 25 25 24 24 22 22 18 18 15 15 11 11 9 9 8 8 8 8 8 8 7 7 6 6 5 1239 5 5 4 4 3 3 3 3 3 3

Here are my statistics for a few months ago: 289 289 227 227 126 126 106 106 96 96 67 67 34 34 27 27 21 21 17 17 15 15 14 14 13 13 12 12 11 11 10 10 9 9 8 8 8 8 7 7 7 7 6 6 5 5 5 5 4 4

Here is my analysis:

The shovel load is high becasue I let Yak use my webspace for videos so everyone that gets a video off there is a hit to my website. Interestingly I get more hits from there than from having my site on the front page of Pretty Shady, which accounts for the next highest hits. Derelict give me the next load of hits. Interestingly I still get a lot of traffic from unknown trails rider even though it’s not been updated in about 6 months.

Fitline-austrailia is the site I made for Achim. doesn’t get me any hits anymore becasue it’s moved to Then it gets interesting.

All of the hits from and have gone, as Rudi doesn’t really do those sites anymore. A few months ago I was getting hits from Trail Addict and 13mx, but I haven’t had any this month. Random BMX gave me a link about the time of the first lot of stats which is why there are a lot of hits coming from there. Now it’s a bit old so I have got less hits.
I get a lot less hits from small wheels big thrills than I used to, proably becasue Chris doesn’t put my site on his news page so much.

Some strange ones: I get hits from I don’t know what that is from, all I can guess it that someone on a xanga site is using my pictures? Also hits from

Digital BMX give me a nice 7 hits a month which is good.

New to the list are Trendwhore, BMX Fraternity and Dig and Ride.

What does this tell us? Who knows, except that those last 3 sites are going to get more visits from me in the future and some promotion.

What suprises me is that this site gets any hits anymore. I haven’t put any riding photos up for such a long time, and that’s not likely to change anytime soon since I can’t ride. Oh well, come back in a year or so.


mainpic1.jpgIt just took me 15 minutes to put on my right sock. This is because I can’t bend my right leg. This is good because yesterday I couldn’t get it on at all. My hamstrings are very tight, and until now I have been too lazy to strech. Now I can’t do much else, and I have been told how important it is.

George Frnch wrote this, which sums it all up quite well, but a lot of people don’t like George French so I’ll tell you some stuff that Tim told me or that I heard somewhere or that I made up becasue it sounds true.

Tim used to do Kung Fu and so he would stretch a lot. The person who taught him Kung Fu said that stretching was very important to you health, and keeps your body strong and supple. I read a book about Bruce Lee once and there was a lot about stretching in there too.

You know you get those yound tennis players who are really good and then you don’t hear about them ever again. Apparently that is becasue they didn’t stretch, so their bodies wore out much quicker that the player who do stretch.

Stretching helps to stop you from developing tendonitis.

It’s tiring too. I ahve been trying to stretch my legs and arms as well as my back but it’s really tiring. I do it when I watch TV so it doesn’t take any time out of my day.

Achim ( doesn’t strech before he runs, he just starts slowly. Tim thinks that this is good becasue if you fall off then your body won’t bend too much into an unfamiliar shape. I don’t agree with this for two reasons.

1. Riding is not like running. You can’t really start off slow – not trails anyway, and it’s explosive, which puts strain on your body.

2. I was told at school that muscles are like blue tac. If you pull them when they are cold, they don’t stretch out so well, but when they are warm, they don’t snap. I don’t know how true this is but it sounds right to me.

Yak has been having a lot of problems with his back. He has gone to see a chiropractor today. I hope they can sort him out becasue backs are dodgy things. I expect that they will tell him lots of stretches to do. I guess what is important is to do the stretches before you get the problems, that way it should be preventative. And also to stretch all of you body, not just the bits that hurt.

So the moral is that it is really important to stretch, at bit before, but especially after you ride. I expect there are people reading this think, yeh but I can’t be bothered, I’ll be ok (Joe probably!). But you won’t be. One day you’ll be old. I want to ride when I am old so I am going to start stretching lots now.

Daytime TV sucks

There’s not really much news considering I can’t really do anything or go anywhere. I can’t get to work, but they send work home for me, so that is giving me something to do. i have already watched 4 films and hours of daytime TV, so there might be some film reviews coing this way.

Tim gave me a lift and I hobbled to some trails on Wednesday to do some filming.

I made some changes to the mega book and I have also been playing the guitar a lot.

I also made this website for Fitline. I need some of that stuff to heal my knee.

I have had a total of 44 click on my google ads in the last 6 months. That has earnt me $4.54. Click click?